Category Archives: PUPPYCAT PAGE

All Things Puppycat

Long Live The Puppycat Page

All Things Puppycat


pUPPYCAT ASKS A QUESTION

By: THE PUPPYCAT KEEPER

(CARROLLTON, TX) –in bed, falling sleep- “Have you written any more on Moloch Rising or do you have writer’s block or something?” “No, I don’t have writer’s block. I want to finish the book I’m reading.” “Which book is it?” “Philosophy of Mind by Edward Feser.” “Didn’t he have some position at Ave Maria University?” “What? No.” “I thought he was part of that at one time or something.” “Oh, no, you are thinking of Fr. Fessio.” “Oh.”

Later that night “Do you know what I think of when I hear ‘Edward Feser’?” “No, what?” -short laugh- “I think of Edward Scissorhands.” “Oh.” “Edward Feserhands! -giggle snort- Hahahahahah.” *silence*

Inquisitive Puppycat “You don’t think that’s funny? I am cracking myself up.” “I’m trying to sleep.” -disappointment- “I thought it was funny. Don’t you?” “I’m asleep.” And then five minutes later the Puppycat Keeper says, “Edward Feserhands.” The Puppycat is silent for a moment, then the bed shakes a little and then, “Hahahahahahahahaha snort giggle.”

THE PUPPYCAT PAGE

All Things Puppycat


Puppycat Wants Something – A gmail chat exchange

By The Puppycat Keeper

CARROLLTON – “Yo quierro Peanut Butter esandwiche.”

“Are you asking me to make you a peanut butter sandwich?”

“Si, tengo hambre, por fa”

*Heavy sigh*

“Quierro cafe, tambien por fa”

Puppycat Keeper looks askance at the Puppycat

“y quierro coca cola.”

Further Developments

CARROLLTON – “I just asked Tracy to make me a peatzi butter sandwich.”

“By Chat?!”

“Yeesss.”

“What’d she say?”

“She said she would.

“Tell her I want one too. Strawberry Jam, Crunchy Peanut Butter, and some Fritos.”

*silence*

“Puppycat, did you tell her?”

“She said she’s on her way.”

“Cool.”

Further, Further Developments

CARROLLTON – “Leon, while you’re standing there will you make me a peatzi butter sandwich?”

“Prolllynotman.”

The Pirate Booty Factor

CARROLLTON – “Puppycat, is that Pirate Booty good?”

“Yes.”

“Can I have some?” – tosses it over to the Puppycat Keeper – “I wonder if it would be good on Peatzi Butter Sandwiches?”

Puppycat looks up all bright-eyed, smiles and says convincingly, “I bet it would be really good. I bet you’d like it a lot!”

non-response from the Puppycat Keeper.

“Can I have my Pirate Booty back?”

“No.”

“Are you flirting with me? Was that a flirtatious response?”

Passion for Peanut Butter

CARROLLTON – “RAWR!”

“OK! I’ll go make you a peanut butter sandwich already!!!”

THE PUPPYCAT PAGE

All Things Puppycat


“I’ll tell you what I want, what I really really want”

By The Puppycat Keeper

CARROLLTON – “Did you write about absinthe?”

“Why, yes, I did.”

“Did you write The Puppycat Page?”

“Um, no, not yet.” Puppycat issues dismissive wave. Puppycat Keeper keeps typing. Moments later – “Wow, I like sleeping.”

“ZZZZZZZZZ”

The Puppycat Keeper thought the Puppycat was safely asleep when suddenly, “You haven’t written anything Puppycat in a long time. [Puppycat Keeper guilty shrug]

Dreamily, “Guess I haven’t done anything.” Puppycat snores resume.

The Puppycat Page

All Things Puppycat


 

“Someone gave the Pope a Lion Cub!”

By The Puppycat Keeper

CARROLLTON – “And he petted it! And now I want one. I wonder if he will keep it. I wonder what people will think.” After pausing to consider this – “What does a lion symbolize in the Bible?”

Puppycat watches youtube videos about Tom Thumb

CARROLLTON – “Some kid is prank calling one of our pharmacies.” Puff – exhale – “That’s 1540, at Forest and Marsh, Juan’s old store.” Time passes. “It’s been three minutes and he hasn’t talked to anybody. He’s getting tired of waiting.” The Puppycat is concerned about customer service to prank callers.

The Puppycat Page

All Things Puppycat


“My Birthday is Coming!” 

By The Puppycat Keeper 

CARROLLTON, Texas – The above was announced with a knowing look and barely disguised expectation. “There shall be no small furry animals,” said the Puppycat Keeper. 

Puppycat coffee time 

CARROLLTON – “I really want a kitty.” “There has been rumor of this yearning,” replied the Puppycat Keeper. “A fine substitute for rumor, however, is this fresh hot perfect coffee.” The Puppycat purrs as she warms her paws holding the Cup of Distraction. 

Puppycats don’t like rain and dark 

CARROLLTON – “It’s dark and everything is shiny. I’m nervous and all the cars want me to go faster.” 

Puppycat has to go to work 

CARROLLTON – January 28, 2009 – The Puppycat was shamed into going to work in the Ice today by her mean overlords. “Grrrrrr” said the Puppycat. “I’m mad. I’m not even packing lunch, I am so mad.” 

Later that morning – “I’m on 190, and I just went under an overpass, and I felt the car slide. It slid for at least 20 feet. I just went with it, but some people are driving fast, and some are driving slow, and I’m mad.” “I’m sorry Puppycat, please be careful”. “Now I am on 190 and it’s all ice. Tell Leon that anywhere there is shade, it is solid ice.” “OK Puppycat. Call me when you get there.” “Ok. I love you bye.” 

Puppycat has a surprise

CARROLLTON – As the Puppycat reads this she will learn that she is going to go to Operation Kindness Saturday to find a kitty. Surprise!! Happy Birthday! You clean the litter box. I am the Puppycat Keeper, you are the Kittycat Keeper.

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